Broken Toys
by Mrs.Sid The Kid
Summary: Adam Copeland is trying to survive life in the real world after years over seas fighting for his country. He is broken and not the person he used to be, no matter how hard he tries. The only light of his life is Jeff Hardy the blue haired art therapist who lives down the hall but Jeff isn't as innocent as he seems. With some work they may be able to mend their broken parts. JadamAU
1. Chapter 1

A/N: So this wouldn't leave my head soooo hopefully you guys like this…Just saying I know nothing about veterns or army stuff but I have been reading so many captain America fanfics, this idea wouldn't leave…soooo here we go..

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><p>Adam never thought he would come home after his third tour of duty. He lost so many friends and had seen countless atrocities. He expected to never set foot back on American soil, part of him wished that was true. He wouldn't have to deal with the awkward conversations with his brother, the pounding headaches, the fact his left arm pretty much hung limply at his side because of the fucking nerve damage from the IED and the worst of all the flashbacks that render him unable to leave the house without having to worry about the impending panic attack. Death would have been so much kinder<p>

"Adam?…Adam?..Adam? You here with us?"

Adam was pulled out of his head by the persistent sound of Jay's voice. He must have checked out again, he knew it scared Jay when he got that thousand yard stare. He ran his hands through his progressively longer hair before looking over at his brother. Jay had a tense look on his face that mirrored his husband Chris's. The only people that were not staring at him were his three year old twin nieces who just cared that Uncle Adam liked having tea parties with them.

" I'm here Jay, I'm here. I'm tired. I couldn't sleep well last night." Adam told him looking down at his barely touched plate eggs. It has been almost six months since he came back home and nothing has been the same, he can't eat, he can't sleep and the fact Jay keeps trying to make him go to a shrink was driving him crazy. He just needed to adjust.

" Well Chris was saying that he was talking to a guy when he took you to the V.A that there is this apartment building just down the street that caters to vets. They have cheap rent, a swimming pool, work out room and there are councilors from the V.A that live there too and are on call if you need them." Jay said passing him some colorful pamphlets. " Plus I know you said you wanted to be more independent and we would be only a twenty minute drive if you ever needed us."

Adam looked down at the papers and tried to look interested. He knew living with Jay would not last long and Adam didn't even blame him. Jay had his only life with Chris, Ruby and Charlotte, they did not need someone with them who goes into meltdown mode when he accidently turns on the hunger games and ends up hiding in the closet screaming. He wouldn't want to live like that. Adam spaced after that, just nodding whenever Jay looked over at him with that hopeful look on his face. He did not want to be a burden on his brother anymore.

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><p>It took two weeks to get everything set up and there Adam was holding a box in his arms as Jay talked animatedly with a man name John who seemed to be the head of the program. John was US marine who got an honorable discharge after 4 tours, he set up the program with the VA after his trouble of getting reacquainted with the outside world. So far it has been a huge success though Jay seemed a lot more excited than he did. He set the box down as he somewhat listened to them. He just clued into tidbits.<p>

"_Service dog…"_

"_Counselling.."_

"_Getting better adjusted.."_

Adam set his box down and walked into the hallway, it was clean and in soft colors. Every door had the person's name on it and there was even signs saying where they are, the year and they are safe incase people check out in the hallways. Adam ran his hand down the textured wall following the soft sound of music coming from the room down the hall. Adam looked at the nameplate on the wall. **Jeff Hardy, Counselor. **The door was wide open he looked in just seeing a thin man with bright blue hair, painting on a large canvas as he sang along to Pearl Jam coming from his radio. Jeff must have known someone was watching him, when the song ended he turned to look over at the doorway giving Adam a soft smile.

" You are the new guy aren't you?" He asked setting down the paint brush he was holding. He did not move closer to the door way but made sure to keep distance from Adam. This guy knew what he was doing, not crowding the crazies. Adam rubbed his neck and looked up from the carpet.

" Ya…Um..I'm Adam. I live down the hall. I kind of wondered away from my brother and John. I'm sorry for interrupting you. I was just tired of listening to them talk to me without really talking to me." Adam looked around the room checking all the sight lines quickly.

" That's how most people feel when they move in here. You can come in if you would like." Jeff motioned for Adam to come into the apartment. " I have a dog so I hope you don't mind. He's one of the therapy dogs I use in my sessions they seem to help…I'm sorry, Im rambling." He pulled his hair up into a loose bun.

" No. no I like dogs." Adam said simply as he walked in doing a quick security check, looking around siting out all of his exits. The apartment was extremely open and inviting, all soft fabrics and bright colors. He sat down on the green couch as a white dog hopped up on the couch beside him nudging his hand. He smiled softly running his fingers through the soft fur.

"The dog is really good at grounding when people check out." Jeff said flopping into a dinning room chair long limbs hanging over the arm rests. " Plus I've had her for years, her name is Willow."

Adam didn't really say much as he watched Jeff talk with a bright smile on his face. Some people might find him alittle too loud to be comfortable but Adam loved it. The blue haired man did not look at him like he was a broken toy who was missing too many pieces to fix. He hated feeling like this, Jay never looked at him like he used too.

" Did you serve?" Adam blurted out as he watched Jeff talk about something to do with his painting.

"Oh me, no I never did. I never fit in very well with the whole don't ask don't tell thing. My old man did and my brother did. I started working at the V.A when Matty came back home and he was having a rough time. They haven't gotten rid of me yet so I guess I'm pretty decent at this thing." Jeff shrugged his light laugh made Adam smile softly. His smile faded quickly though when he heard his brother's frantic voice coming from the hallway.

" I should have probably told him I was going for a walk." He admitted softly as Jay walked into the room looking slightly frantic as John looked like he was trying to calm him down.

" Addy, you need to tell me when you leave. I didn't know where you went or if you had an episode…"

"Jay, I'm living by myself now, I should be able to go down the hallway by myself. You aren't going to be able to hover over me anymore." Adam chuckled softly when that deflated his brother pretty quickly. "You wanted me to be independent, you gotta trust me."

" I trust you Addy, I know you are gonna do fine. You do need to help me unpack you house though. I don't know where you want things. Thank you for everything John, I think we are pretty much settled in." Jay said helping Adam up off the couch.

"No problem guys, Adam if you ever need anything I am in apartment 109 and you should come to the VA tomorrow and we can figure out a schedule for you." John told him. Adam nodded and stayed close to his brother. He looked over John's shoulder and gave Jeff a shy smile.

" Adam, you can always come and talk to me too whenever. Doesn't matter what time, I am usually always awake."

" I'll keep that in mind." Adam said still smiling slightly as he followed Jay out of the room and down to his own apartment. The nerves he had this morning were still there but now it was just a dull ache and not full blown panic but he still had to make it through a night by himself and nights never seemed to go well.

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><p>The night surprisingly was not any worse than usual, nowhere near better but no worse. Adam fell into a restless sleep around 3 in the morning, sleeping till 6 before waking up in a cold sweat with the sense of impending doom. He followed his ritualized early morning routine of a handful of pills, peppermint tea and a piece of toast all while listening to the radio. Adam could not help the small flutter in his chest when he heard the first few opening cords to Pearl Jam's Even Flow.<p>

Adam looked over to the door way and saw a small yellow piece of paper by the door. He set down his plate and went over picking the note up with his hand and unfolded it. It was a note from Jeff, full of loopy cursive and a few quick flower doddles. That flutter in his chest got worse as he read the note.

_Adam_

_The first day is the hardest but after  
>that everything is going to change for the better.<em>

_I believe in you_

_Jeff_


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Thank you so much for the reviews! They make me want to write so much more!

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><p>John really did not look like a guy who would be running the V.A but he does even though he has always been clad in jeans and tee shirts every time Adam has seen him. It made this place feel more relaxed and less likely that he was just spending his days with crazy people like him. This helped Adam's hands to not shake as badly when he listened to John explain his therapy options to him .<p>

" I want to do art therapy." Adam told him looking down at his hands trying to make the tremors stop.

" You know art therapy is a group atmosphere, which I think will be good for you even though you haven't had anything other than private sessions so far. We can get you into his session this afternoon, then you can also meet some other people who live in the apartment building also." John said sliding a piece of paper across the wood desk that had Adam's schedule on it. He had to be here three days a week, talk to the psychologist once a week and physiotherapy four days a week.

"Thank you so much John." He pulled the paper closer to him and looked down at it studying the bright white paper carefully.

" You are gonna do great, you have done so much in your short time here, I know things will get even better."

Adam tried not to chuckle at that. Everyone here had such an optimism, he was nowhere as optimistic for how he was going to end up but at least therapy was better than nothing. He kept the piece of paper tight in his hands as he left John's office. He had about half an hour before therapy started so he just went to the room so he could see Jeff.

He was humming to himself setting up paper and paints at the six chairs at the long table. His hair was purple now piled up on top on his head in a messy bun. He jumped when he saw Adam standing in the door way.

"Oh hi Adam. Come in, I wanna know how your first day was?" Jeff asked hopping up on the table folding his legs underneath himself.

"Its been good. I haven't don't much. I just talked to John and had physio on my arm. I thought wasn't going to go as good as it has been." Adam shrugged and sat down in one of the chairs by the table. " I got your note too. I really liked it." He said almost shyly.

" It was a big step to move out on your own, I thought you could use alittle encouragement." Jeff said fixing his purple hair. " I'm happy for ya Adam." He jumped off the table when he looked at the clock." Oh shit okay the other guys should be here soon, I'll be right back I need to grab some shit out of my car. You sit tight, I'll be right back."

Adam didn't know why he enjoyed being around the colourful man so much. Just something about him drew Adam in and he wasn't going to question it. Now all he had to do was make it through group without anything happening.

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><p>Well group went well until someone spilled some red paint and then shit went down. Jeff instructed them all too just paint whatever they wanted, Jeff said he just wanted them to relax into the idea of doing this kind of stuff. There were five other men in group. Randy an angry looking ex-marine, Mike another ex-marine who did not look really old enough to have even enlisted yet, Alex an air force pilot who seems very close to mike and Ted and Cody both army they haven't left each others side since group started.<p>

Everything was fine until Mike leaned over the table to grab a new color when he knocked over the jar of red paint into Randy covering the front of his shirt. Something seemed to change in Randy when he looked down at his paint covered shirt, his eyes narrowed as he scrambled up from the chair quickly. His breathing was coming out labored and he was shaking. Adam knew what was happening, Randy was having and episode.

"Shit. Hey Randy it's just paint. Come on big guy, you are safe here." Jeff said calmly as he went up to him making sure to keep a good distance between them. Randy was pacing and muttering under his breath.

" Who's hurt? Who did I hurt, why is there blood on me?" He asked looking at Jeff though his eyes were still unfocused.

" Randy you are at the V.A, it is just paint. You gotta come back to us." Jeff said still in his calm voice. Randy seemed to come back just abit until Jeff made the mistake of touching Randy's arm. He didn't noticed Randy's other arm come up and his fist catching Jeff in the mouth. Everything turned into a dull roar in Adam's head. He saw John run in with the shrink Trish and a few people he didn't recognize. They were trying to diffuse the situation but Jeff wouldn't let them anywhere need Randy.

" John, you better back the fuck up, I'm not even kidding right now." Jeff told him wiping his bloody mouth off on the sleeve of his shirt before approaching Randy again. " Randy you are at the V.A nothing is wrong. You did nothing wrong. Focus on what you are feeling."

Randy's hands felt the wall behind him, his fingers trailing over the wall slowly. Adam recognized this from when he got really bad when he got home, it helped ground him. Randy seemed to shake off what ever was going on in his head and his eyes seemed to clear.

" You back with us?" Jeff asked with a small smile on his face.

"Oh my god Jeff, I didn't…I'm so sorry..I didn't." Randy said frantically looking around the room at everyone staring at him. He racked his hands over his face franticly.

"Everything is good Randy, how about you go and get cleaned up and talk to Trish then we can get ya home." Jeff said softly stepping to the side as Randy nodded and followed the small blonde women with the kind smile.

" We are gonna talk about this later Jeff." John told him before following the rest of them out of the room. Jeff let out a shaky sigh and rubbed his face before turning back to the group still at the table. Alex had Mike pulled tight against his side, Ted had his eyes closed and his head on the table and Cody just looked scared.

" Okay guys we are gonna post pone the rest of group. Is everyone good? Trish can talk to you guys if you need it." Nobody but Mike took Jeff up on his offer, He led the group out but Adam didn't even move from his seat until Jeff came back.

"Shit, Adam. I didn't know you were still in here..You okay?" He asked sitting in the chair beside him looking even more tired.

" Your face looks like it hurts. You could have been hurt." Adam frowned and reached up with his good hand to touch the side of Jeff's face that started to swell. Jeff froze looking at Adam with wide eyes before relaxing.

" He wouldn't have hurt me. Randy is a good guy."Jeff sighed softly when Adam moved his hand back down to his lap. " I'll be okay tomorrow, I was more worried about if you guys were okay or not. I'm used to having to deal with people who disappear in their heads. My brother did it a lot, I was 18 having to take care of him after he got back; It was hard but he took care of me when I was little so I had to take care of him."

"And now you are stuck with all of us crazies."

"Adam, hasn't Trish told ya you shouldn't talk about yourself that way." Jeff leaned over brushing a bit of hair out of Adam's face. " No one here is crazy but everyone here has seen things that no one should and y'all just need someone to talk too. Now you better get home and I better go talk to John, he's gonna give me shit for this." Jeff slid off the table and handed Adam his coat. " Remember if you need to talk just come down to my apartment."

"I will, thank you for talking to me." Adam gave Jeff a small smile holding his jacket close to his chest. He walked out of the building feeling lighter then he has for a while. The world seemed just a little brighter, he could not help but think it had to do with Jeff.


	3. Chapter 3

AN: Long time no update…This is kind of a filler chapter but Adam is making friends which I enjoy!

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><p>The thing Adam really liked about the apartment building was the gym. It was top of the line and rather quiet for how much people seemed to work out in this building. His therapist gave him a list of work outs to do to help regain strength in his arm. He knew Jay would have wanted him to sleep a bit after therapy but he was still alittle too high strung after everything that happened. He wasn't the only one that seemed too high stung to rest. Randy was the only other person in the gym, he was doing box jumps up on to a box that reached just above his waist, his shirt was stuck to his back and he was breathing hard. Adam watched him do a few more jumped before he stumbled on his way up, falling and smashing his face on to the box.<p>

"Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!" He shouted smashing his fist down on the wooden box. Adam grabbed a water bottle and a towel before walking over to Randy quickly, stopping far enough away not to startle him.

" Hey, you okay?" Adam asked moving a little bit closer when Randy looked at him. He was had a cut on his chin that was bleeding but he looked okay.

" You saw that didn't you?" He asked taking the towel from Adam to put on his chin to stop the blood flow.

" You were doing good up until then." Adam sat on the weight bench watching Randy who just let his head fall back against the wooden box. " You know according the John over excising is a form of self harming behavior." He tried to give him a soft smile.

" Fucking John, you have never seen him in here lifting five hundred pounds." Randy laughed shaking his head slightly. " You were in Jeff's group weren't ya..Saw my freak out?"

"Happens to the best of us." Adam shrugged passing Randy the extra water bottle in his hand. " Happened to me once, my brother and his boyfriend were having a fourth of july party and I was okay until the fire works went off. I scared the sit out of my niece and it took my brother an hour to get me from out under the deck."

" Happened at my old man's birthday. I had a panic attack in the middle of a fancy restaurant when a waiter spooked me. So fucking embarrassing. How long have you been back?" Randy asked him before swigging back his water.

" Almost a year now, I was in an out of the hospital the first six months. I got a fucked up arm and head. IED fucked me up pretty bad."

"I've been back for almost two years now. Id be a lot worse if it wasn't for living here. But you know the good days are good and the bad days are really bad. Today I guess was a bad day. Didn't mean to hurt Jeff, he is one of the better councilors here." He sighed rubbing his face.

" I talked to him after class and he was okay…You know this might seem forward since we just met but if you ever need to talk you can talk to me." Adam said before he could stop himself. He usually kept to himself but he could here John's voice in his head telling him he should try to make friends.

" Sounded like you were hitting on me." Randy teased running a hand over his short hair. " I could use a gym buddy, everyone else thinks I am too intense." He chuckled puling himself up of the ground. "Promise I'll go easy on ya newbie."

Adam grinned for one of the first times in a while. He pulled himself off and moved a smaller box beside Randy's. " Better not fall on your face this time."

Randy grinned at him before cracking his neck and started jumping again. Adam followed suit, he liked this being with someone like him made him feel like he was less likely to fuck up. It seemed like things were starting to get better even though Adam knew that wouldn't last overly long.


End file.
